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Is there still any loyal men out there?

ForumFriendship and relationships

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  • EMILY826

    February 10

    Men will come to u as sheep in wolves clothing sometimes we say hes god sent when its the devil in full.my sisters and brothers satán was a beautiful ángel in heaven but his greed turn his life around he was cast out of heaven and r here now on earth and these men who indeed pretend ha lord have mercy upon them may u pray for me through my trials and that god may restore and be with me always amen.

    February 10 updated by EMILY826

  • February 10

    > Men will come to u as sheep in wolves clothing

    That's some grand over generalization right there.. I'm sorry if you're going through a bad-enough situation that has prompted you to make such an emotional statement, or if you're simply carrying too much emotional baggage to view the situation from a more objective standpoint, but at least from a logical point of view, why would you think that an assertion like that about all men in general makes sense? It's not like you've met them all, much less had meaningful relationships with all of them, right? I'm confident in saying that you've not had a relationship with even a statistically significant sample size. (Not you, and not anyone else; there's not enough time in anyone's life to pull off such a feat, and obviously anyone attempting such a thing has deeper issues to address, but I digress.)

    Obviously, there are men out there that will remain (and have remained) faithful, just as there're women who have remained faithful and others that haven't and/or won't. Other than showing that humans (i.e. not just men and not just women) are inherently sinful and that both have moral failings relative to God's standard, what does that really prove?

    How does having a poor experience with 1 or 2 individuals justify such an over reaching generalization about the other ~3.49 Billion[1] you've never met before (and probably never will)? In addition, why would anyone use their interaction with some person P to then turn around and make claims about some other person Q, as if that even made sense? For example, what would you say if some man you've never met before applied your own line of reasoning on you by saying something like "Well, my ex-girlfriend was unfaithful to me; therefore, you will also be unfaithful to me."? It'd be just as unwarranted if some random man came around asking "Are there still any loyal women out there?" and then asserted "[All] Women will only come to you when you have money".

    In any case, I hope that you're able to sort out and address whatever it is that you're going through and that you're able to realize that you're not doing yourself any good service with such blanket statements. You could easily end up discarding someone else as a potential partner for very bad reasons. In the worst case, other men who could've otherwise become interested in getting to know you better may simply choose to look elsewhere after seeing how you've labeled them before even meeting them or even knowing they existed. And I get the feeling this is not what you really want.

    Regards,
    -r

    [1] This is based on statistical data at en.worldstat.info/World from 2011. Data from 2018 at www.worldometers.info/world-population/ shows it's closer to 3.8 Billion, but the distinction is irrelevant to the point.

    February 10 updated by XRAY948

  • EMILY826

    February 11

    Thank u for your genours respond but i am not responding to all men in general i speak of anyand i am not speaking of myself in particular i have known a lot of ladies who have gone through bad experiences sometimes in life we all go through trials temptations yes men also on my point of view. Men will come yes they will go yes but it is the will of god to say yes thats the person i have prepared for u so dont get me wrong and misunderstood me am just wondering in this society if there is any thank u and god bless.

  • February 11

    This is just a brief response to a couple of points.

    > i am not responding to all men in general ... so dont get me wrong and misunderstood me

    I didn't misunderstand what you originally wrote. What you wrote is perhaps not what you intended to communicate, but I only have what you actually wrote available -not your intentions.

    When you say "Men will come to u as sheep in wolves clothing" without any qualifiers to limit its scope (e.g. "Some men ..."), it means something else; qualifying the statement would've made big difference.

    In any case, thanks for the clarification. Still, this is true of any person, regardless of gender or any other attribute people arbitrarily choose to focus on.

    > it is the will of god to say yes thats the person i have prepared for u

    Other than God's statement "It is not good that the man should be alone; I will make him a helper fit for him" (Gen. 2:18), which was made before the fall, I'm not at all aware of God having promised spouses to anyone. In other words, I'm not aware of any verse in the Bible that would justify believing that "God has someone prepared for me" or "God has prepared me for someone else".. especially after the entrance of sin into the world.

    So, while it may be the case that God has been, or will be, gracious enough to allow some people to "find each other" (for lack of a better phrase), there's no actual promise as far as I'm aware.

    If you believe there is, then could you please provide Biblical references?

    > am just wondering in this society if there is any

    I'm not sure I understand your point.

    On the one hand you're "just wondering ... if there is any" man that is faithful. On the other hand, you start by saying that "Men will come to u as sheep in wolves clothing", which implicitly assumes at the outset that the answer is "No". Yet, if you only intended to communicate that you only had some (not all) men in mind, which is fair, then the implicit answer is already a "Yes" by definition, which comes across as strange to say the least :)

    > thank u and god bless

    Likewise.

    -r

    February 11 updated by XRAY948

  • EMILY826

    February 11

    Thank u

  • February 12

    @Emily826,the Lord says good gifts come from above,again He has set apart so many who have not 'defiled' themselves according to the evil selfish nature of this world and no matter how evil the world turns to be,still you can find a man after your own heart and be happy.God says,"is there anything too hard for me?"to mean He knew of some circumstances in human lives that would make them doubt His ability,,trust me you have not reached your msn yet and again you are being refined so that when you meet him you are mature enough to treasure him and love in gratitude.we stop living when we stop hoping and believing,my prayer is that you'll always find strength to keep walking till you reach your destiny,you are strong than you think,keep on..

  • February 15

    Interesting take on the question "Where are the Godly Guys ,Female Christians ask?" Gives both a male  & female perspective.

  • MILLE638

    March 3

    Dear Emily,

    May the Peace of the Lord be with us all

    We cannot Judge all men for some bad guys we've met or heard about....

    I also know women who are not interested in commitment. It's not Always men's fault.

    Believe me, it's all About talking and seeing What you've got in common, if you share the same opinions and desires....

  • March 3

    My point of view is not that all men hate commitment, but they are in the minority, as their

    male ego pushes them to hold on to as many as they can, at one time, rathr than decide if

    you want a commitment, if not, wait until you know what is the right thing to do. If you say

    you are a Christian, then let your llight and life be a witness to the world.

    Elma

  • MILLE638

    March 4

    Cool, Elma!

    Applause!!!!

  • March 4

    There are quite a number of loyal men out there but the problem is that, some ladies maybe due to their past experiences, they allow scepticism to override them. Be that as it may, as Christians we need to pray for discerning spirit. God bless.

  • March 12

    ELMA201 wrote:

    My point of view is not that all men hate commitment, but they are in the minority, as their male ego pushes them to hold on to as many as they can, at one time, rathr than decide if you want a commitment

    I think the "male ego" claim has little to no substance and is very superficial. As with most topics, we need to look below the surface.

    As a purely practical matter, some men have learned to be more careful, or avoid it altogether, for several reasons. At least in the US, some of these include purely practical side-effects, most of which are generally positive for women, but negative for men.

    Unfortunately, marriage in the world we live in is not completely defined or based on what the Bible  says and people cannot really live up to said standard anyway. Ultimately, it is a legal contract between two people, and one in which the men tend to get the short end of the stick (e.g. risk losing their belongings, home, financial burden in child support and alimony, jail if they cannot afford them, etc.)

    TL;DR; In today's society, it's trivially easy for a woman to destroy a man without consequence if she so chooses (relatively speaking), and the Govt. court system will help. In short, while a woman has barely anything to lose and much to gain by getting married, the opposite is true for men in general.

    Thus, given those things, you can also expect the men who are still interested in getting married at some point to be a lot more careful about who they choose to be with. And who can blame them? Any rational individual would do the same if they had a lot at stake, regardless of gender.

    Why would any rational person enter into an agreement where the penalties generally outweigh the rewards and in which the odds of success are generally not so great (roughly 52% IIRC)? Even an 75% chance of success would be significantly greater than what marriage statistics currently show, yet (by analogy) if anyone here wanted to go skydiving and were told that 1 in 4 parachutes do not open (i.e. a 25% chance of death), no rational person would jump.

    On a more personal note, while I've been able to endure and survive many things that life has thrown at me, one thing I don't expect to "survive" is a bad woman/wife. IMHO, this is because while a man can generally endure "external attacks", a woman can undo a man from the inside and there's no defense against that. Consider that it was Delilah who really succeeded at destroying Samson after all his enemies had failed. (She used emotional manipulation to accomplish her goal, and accomplish it she did.) Therefore, I can guarantee that I'll be very careful in deciding who I choose to be with, if I find anyone at all.

    While I don't necessarily agree with 100% of the following explanation, I do believe the author got a major portion of it right and would be worth listening to, so here she is:

    March 12 updated by XRAY948

  • VANESSA599

    March 13

    Interesting video. Thanks for sharing.

  • March 17

    Somehow the battle between the sexes always devolve into matters of he said & she said. Ultimately devolving back to our biases. We all know good men/women & we all know bad men/women.

    As a Christian girl/ woman,l have definitely felt EMILY826's frustration.Though l would rephrase the question a bit as we have all at one point lamented at the lack of Godly guys out there.

    This is because if you are not a christian then there is no standard to live up to,then it would be easier to just go out with any guy.Because there are lots of men out there but,few that follow the  ways of God.The worldly standard advocates many things from sleeping around,just do it no consequences & infinite freedom ( whatever this is). Popular culture even encourages men not to marry because of the way that marriage is a shackle ( the ball and chain myth) & committment.(Shows like Friends,Living Single,30something all advocate this view point).Or the character Barny Stinson from "How I met your mother" chronic lier who sleeps around so much,that he makes it his mission to take a different woman with him each night.

    There is a general disillusionment when it comes to the male species due to this constant bad portrayal by the  mainstream media of men.For example fathers/dads are often portrayed as silly,out of touch,senseless buffoons.Classic examples  is Homer Simpson( lol) from the Simpsons who is a caricature of what men / husbands/ fathers are really like.

    To this extent when a man fails to live up to our expectations (whatever they maybe),then we make that conclusion that all men are bad.This is simply because we are constantly being conditioned to think like this. Hence the over generalisation.

    So what is my point? l guess to a certain extent l don't think we should easily dismiss EMILY826's concerns for it's lack of  coherence. Personally there are certain issues that l feel men would do better at.For example,in South Africa the trend of fatherlessness is on the rise with 60-70% of children born in 2016 not having the details of their father on their birth certificate.This means the children might never know who their father is & the father didn't care enough to find out about their child or give them a name.

    I wish more men would be committed to being better fathers to their children.Taking care, providing & being there for them.I believe this would ensure a stronger next generation. I strongly feel that this is an issue that only men can change as it's their role to be fathers & be present in their children's lives especially if the child is a boy.When you see boys playing together,it just clicks that no matter how good a mother is,the boy always needs other boys/men to understand who he is.There are only things men can do & only things women can do,inspite of how hard we try to blur the gender lines.

    I'm a firm believer in & support men's rights there are a few things I noted about the video shared by XRAY948 & the book advertised written by Helen Smith.

    The overall tone seems to assume /imply that women win in a divorce whereas nobody really wins. Families are broken, children are affected & it's not easy being a single parent.It's also a misconception to paint women's lives as all good & they are having all the fun while the male folk suffer.Men and women will always be different,as nature dictates.

    "The implication that women are out to trick men into providing for them; that they want to control their lives and never give anything back" is also really not a true reflection of the whole situation.Further I find it extremely sad (& have never seen the logic)  that some fathers don't enjoy paying child support.I found this out when I worked at a family court, some men even produced fake documents to try & pay as little as possible.Should children really suffer because of their parent's choices? What did your kids,do to you except being born!! The argument should be more towards the fact that nobody wins in a divorce and that the family is under crisis. This is a war that nobody wins.

    As a case in point it's worth noting that historically we are the unhappiest we have ever been despite our so-called advances.More people are depressed, unhappy & unsatisfied with their lives despite all the "freedom" that we have.Maybe we are not so free!!!

    Ultimately both men & women make up a marriage. Even if you do find that perfect match,with 100% compatibility, marriage is still a journey fraught with many challenges.It is only the beginning of the journey, because after the 'fairy-tale' wedding things settle back to reality.The biggest being you are two fallen human beings living in a fallen world.It will be your duty to fight for your marriage.So my thoughts are just it is still up to us as individuals or as Christians to choose to walk in the right path.I pray we all choose life,not because the way is easy,not because the world doesn't have other options for us but because it's who we are as the people of God.

    And we should not stop believing or praying for that 'special someone that knows God despite the statistics or our ages.So that we could say "God did it" and God would say he has a remnant in us.(1 Kings 19: 10 - 18).

    Deuteronomy 30:19

    New Living Translation

    "Today I have given you the choice between life and death, between blessings and curses. Now I call on heaven and earth to witness the choice you make. Oh, that you would choose life, so that you and your descendants might live!

    The bible in 2 Chronicles 16:9 (NLT) says "The eyes of the Lord search the whole earth in order to strengthen those whose hearts are fully committed to him"

    Proverbs 20:6

    Many a man proclaims his own steadfast love, but a faithful man who can find?

    Psalms 53:2

    God looks down from heaven on the children of man to see if there are any who understand, who seek after God.

    So l think the fact that even God has to look  for  people who are faithful,shows just how human beings are susceptible to faithlessness. This is directed at both men & women in relation to their relationship with God.

    www.nationalreview.com/2017/02 ... divorce-caveat/

    www.washingtonpost.com/news/in ... m=.f4b873f246a1

    www.thetrumpet.com/128-why-thi ... acks-leadership

  • March 25

    Can we defend or dethrone God by our opinions, ideas, values, traditions, laws, cultures etc? How?
    How do these verses relate to your values? Have you become uncomfortable to read the following verses below? Do you argue against these words of God? Do you try to justify the reasons you do not support these verses?
    Philippians 4:6
    “Be careful for nothing; but in every thing by prayer and supplication with thanksgiving let your requests be made known unto God.”

    2 Corinthians 6:14 ►
    Verse (Click for Chapter)
    New International Version
    Do not be yoked together with unbelievers. For what do righteousness and wickedness have in common? Or what fellowship can light have with darkness
    1 Corinthians 7:9
    New International Version
    But if they cannot control themselves, they should marry, for it is better to marry than to burn with passion.
    Revelation 22:19 King James Version (KJV)
    19 And if any man shall take away from the words of the book of this prophecy, God shall take away his part out of the book of life, and out of the holy city, and from the things which are written in this book.

    Ephesians 5:21-33 New International Version (NIV)
    Instructions for Christian Households
    21 Submit to one another out of reverence for Christ.
    22 Wives, submit yourselves to your own husbands as you do to the Lord. 23 For the husband is the head of the wife as Christ is the head of the church, his body, of which he is the Savior. 24 Now as the church submits to Christ, so also wives should submit to their husbands in everything.
    25 Husbands, love your wives, just as Christ loved the church and gave himself up for her 26 to make her holy, cleansing[a] her by the washing with water through the word, 27 and to present her to himself as a radiant church, without stain or wrinkle or any other blemish, but holy and blameless. 28 In this same way, husbands ought to love their wives as their own bodies. He who loves his wife loves himself. 29 After all, no one ever hated their own body, but they feed and care for their body, just as Christ does the church— 30 for we are members of his body. 31 “For this reason a man will leave his father and mother and be united to his wife, and the two will become one flesh.”[b] 32 This is a profound mystery—but I am talking about Christ and the church. 33 However, each one of you also must love his wife as he loves himself, and the wife must respect her husband.
    Malachi 2:13-16 New International Version (NIV)
    13 Another thing you do: You flood the LORD’s altar with tears. You weep and wail because he no longer looks with favor on your offerings or accepts them with pleasure from your hands. 14 You ask, “Why?” It is because the LORD is the witness between you and the wife of your youth. You have been unfaithful to her, though she is your partner, the wife of your marriage covenant.
    15 Has not the one God made you? You belong to him in body and spirit. And what does the one God seek? Godly offspring.[a] So be on your guard, and do not be unfaithful to the wife of your youth.
    16 “The man who hates and divorces his wife,” says the LORD, the God of Israel, “does violence to the one he should protect,”[b] says the LORD Almighty.
    So be on your guard, and do not be unfaithful.

    1 Corinthians 6:9-11 ESV / 163 helpful votes
    Or do you not know that the unrighteous will not inherit the kingdom of God? Do not be deceived: neither the sexually immoral, nor idolaters, nor adulterers, nor men who practice homosexuality, nor thieves, nor the greedy, nor drunkards, nor revilers, nor swindlers will inherit the kingdom of God. And such were some of you. But you were washed, you were sanctified, you were justified in the name of the Lord Jesus Christ and by the Spirit of our God.


    2 Timothy 3 King James Version (KJV)

    3 This know also, that in the last days perilous times shall come.

    2 For men shall be lovers of their own selves, covetous, boasters, proud, blasphemers, disobedient to parents, unthankful, unholy,

    3 Without natural affection, trucebreakers, false accusers, incontinent, fierce, despisers of those that are good,

    4 Traitors, heady, highminded, lovers of pleasures more than lovers of God;

    5 Having a form of godliness, but denying the power thereof: from such turn away.

    6 For of this sort are they which creep into houses, and lead captive silly women laden with sins, led away with divers lusts,

    7 Ever learning, and never able to come to the knowledge of the truth.

    8 Now as Jannes and Jambres withstood Moses, so do these also resist the truth: men of corrupt minds, reprobate concerning the faith.

    9 But they shall proceed no further: for their folly shall be manifest unto all men, as their's also was.

    10 But thou hast fully known my doctrine, manner of life, purpose, faith, longsuffering, charity, patience,

    11 Persecutions, afflictions, which came unto me at Antioch, at Iconium, at Lystra; what persecutions I endured: but out of them all the Lord delivered me.

    12 Yea, and all that will live godly in Christ Jesus shall suffer persecution.

    13 But evil men and seducers shall wax worse and worse, deceiving, and being deceived.

    14 But continue thou in the things which thou hast learned and hast been assured of, knowing of whom thou hast learned them;

    15 And that from a child thou hast known the holy scriptures, which are able to make thee wise unto salvation through faith which is in Christ Jesus.

    16 All scripture is given by inspiration of God, and is profitable for doctrine, for reproof, for correction, for instruction in righteousness:

    17 That the man of God may be perfect, thoroughly furnished unto all good works.

  • April 5

    I'm strongly of belief there are godly men out there as well as there are godly ladies or women.

    The balancing questions are; do the single who is praying God for a partner truly believe in God's ability to grant him or her the best, one is praying God for and deserve.

    It's one thing to be praying for something and another to truly be qualifying oneself by faith and works of deserving what one is praying God for as an answer.

    Asking God for what you don't believe God should or will give you is amis and mischief.

    If females want to know if there are really godly male partners out there, are females singles in concern, godly? Do expecting females singles deserve godly men as partners by the way they live their lives as females singles? Does our faith and convictions in God tell females singles they deserve godly males as life partners by the way we live our lives?

    If nothing indicts us before God in our conscience of receiving answers to our prayers, then we should receive answers to our prayers.

  • August 11

    let us continue trusting GOD...

  • August 19

    Dear everybody

    Yes there is still a good men here in this site. Im serching for a partner to me with a serious manner. But if i found the person I talk to not suitable to me or vice versa this is not means that I am not a good man. The relation between man and women needs to build on faith and truthness besides some demands and personalities that each part can see it with their future partner.

    Thank you and God bless you all

  • HANEE643

    September 6

    Not every man or woman are bad but there are many bad man out there just as there are many bad woman. The only true one is God and rest will disappoint you sometime in your life....

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